You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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