so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I'm jealous of your bromance
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Randomize
