I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
