Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
