It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
