loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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