a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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