Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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