Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
im six kinds of drunk right now
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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