i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
We just shotgunned beers for America
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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