Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(908): View more from New Jersey

You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals

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(702): View more from Nevada

whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want

Fav 39 7481 1808
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(805): View more from California

I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.

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(931): View more from Tennessee

On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!

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(253): View more from Washington

I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.

Fav 4 2183 921
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(402): View more from Nebraska

We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?

Fav 1 1159 819
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(219): View more from Indiana

Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt

Fav 4 1991 954
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(425): View more from Washington

Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.

Fav 1 676 413
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(289): View more from Ontario

I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN

(416): View more from Toronto

HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN

Fav 1 14 59
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