This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
