It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
