Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
