The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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