i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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