Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
