We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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