someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
