I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
