It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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