Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
