Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Randomize
