You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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