Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
