Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
