I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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