Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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