I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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