i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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