Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
