that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
is that a dick in a sweater?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
