she looked like the bat from fern gully.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
