Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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