in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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