She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
