Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Sext me about skeletons
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
