I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize