My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
