The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Randomize
