so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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