Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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