dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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