Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
