If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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