I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
