Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
