It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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