I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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