This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Randomize
